let it burn
I’m not a photographer. I know, I know, everything after “I am” creates. But it’s true, I’m not. I took one photography class in college and absolutely loved it. I can appreciate a good photograph but I never feel like I can capture that exact moment; I don’t have the eye for it. I was visiting this preschool project and these children were outside playing. Something felt different. I was energetically drawn to two little boys even though neither one of them would look at me. I don’t know if they were afraid, embarrassed or intimidated,
Illusion. We all know the Webster Dictionary definition: illusion: ɪˈluːʒ(ə)n/ noun; (1
I’ve been lucky enough to have people who are still in my life that have accepted me for who I am. They may not personally understand why I’m on this journey and they don’t need to. They accept me and support me no matter what. You have to understand we all have different paths. It doesn’t make them right or wrong, there is no right or wrong. If we all lived the same life things sure would be boring. Every creature has its place and purpose that is known as our Inner Nature. If we listen to that we will know what our purpose in life is. Yet so many of us stay stuck in the wrong job, the wrong marriage and in the wrong place. If we listen to and respect our Inner Nature, we know where we do and do NOT belong. But are we willing to admit it to ourselves? The trick is knowing your truth and making it authentic to you instead of comparing yourself and your life to anyone else’s. One man’s food is another man’s poison. If we work with the natural order of things instead of resisting and struggling against what is meant for us, we can operate with minimal effort. Take nature for instance. Nature follows it’s instincts and operates flawlessly. Remember, nature always finds a way…and it really always does. It is the brain of
A while back I had a small portion of my natal chart read by a trusted astrologist. She told me that one of my greatest purposes in this lifetime is to seek and find my truth. I am here in this lifetime to be a teacher, to help teach others to find their own truths through learning and sharing the knowledge and lessons of my journey. When she told me this I didn’t know I was leaving for this trip, I didn’t know anything about it yet. She told me I was going to be doing a lot of traveling by car or train. Using planes only to get to these destinations. It was a hard decision regarding sharing these very personal details of my physical, emotional, mental and spiritual life on this blog, but I knew I had to. I also knew that despite my fears, it would be received with love. You can’t argue with your true purpose but you can choose not to accept it, we all have free will. If you do accept it, rest assured it will benefit you and others beautifully.
This is my reality and I have chosen to accept it. Three weeks ago I almost bought a ticket home. I cried so hard and told the Universe, I don’t know if I can do this…I don’t know if I am strong enough. All I kept hearing back was, yes you can. The thought of going home didn’t make me feel like a failure, it was nothing like that, but it felt like the wrong decision. it was a distraction, avoidance
Understand that awakening and finding your true purpose isn’t only for the naturally spiritually inclined. It is accessible to everyone and it is a gift we are given. Some of us choose to accept it and some of us choose not to. It took me 29 years to begin to accept it. So I find myself again questioning what I believe about God. Not really the existence of God but his actuality. As I expand my horizons and I am exposed to the wisdom and knowledge that is tucked away in the remote places of this earth I begin to see it all anew. Is God a form who died for our sins and reigns in the heavens above, separate from man? Or is he just a man, like you and I, who was awakened to his truths, flowing flawlessly with the natural order of things and became full of so much light that he was able to walk on water and heal the sick. That kind of awakening, does it exist in us all? Is this state attainable by any man should he chose to embrace it? Christians believe there will be a rapture, where God returns to earth to save his children. What if, just what if, we are what we are waiting for? What if we are meant to save ourselves with the spirit of God that resides inside of us. Is this state of being available for us to understand that the spirit of God simply lives within us all, ready to give us the answers if we choose to listen? What if God is us and we are God and this whole time he has been right inside of us patiently waiting for us to save ourselves???
So bring on the flames. I am fearful, but I will not stop. I am prepared, and those tools that I don’t have yet I will acquire. I will continue to uncover my reality and end my illusion because my life depends on it.
“Step into the fire of self-discovery. This fire will not burn you, it will only burn what you are not.” -Mooji
Until we meet again,
*ps: the captions on the photos are unable to be seen on a mobile device so I will just explain them here. The 2 very bright and colorful pictures are of the sun rising one morning as I started teaching my yoga class. The sky kept changing like it was a living watercolor. There is a picture of me eating a traditional Sri Lankan meal (so ridiculously spicy that I could only eat the rice!) at a Full Moon celebration they have one time a year in the local town where I live. They cook the food in giant pots over
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